Man alive I have so much to tell you all.

First off, I retract (most of) what I said about dietitians sucking and being money grubbing jerks. I posted a craigslist ad and also an ad on some other random site about finding a dietitian and being very clear that I cannot pay them. Believe it or not, I got a lot of responses. A lot of recent grads, which is fine with me, and in general just a lot of people looking to help. I offered to barter design services, but many of them said they'd just do it out of the kindness of their hearts.

Not only did I find I dietitian but I found the jackpot of all dietitians. I found Sara, a girl who lives 10 minutes from where I work, a recent grad, who also has MS. Holy shit! Mega perfecto. Not only is Sara so rad that shes willing to help me out, but she knows her shit. So Sara if you're reading this, I totally appreciate your efforts.

So if you're in a similar boat as I am, post an ad, you never know who will answer it. But if you meet a total creeper, don't blame me.


On another front, some of you may have seen the picture I posted from the office of a clinical trial neuro. So I did it, I went and I chatted their ears off with questions galore, smart ass quips and concerns. I began the initial testing to see if I even qualify for the study, which is the Tower Study, for teriflumonide. It's an oral drug that does pretty much what every other oral drug in testing does. Its nothing special, but its available.

I don't really know what I was expecting at my first visit, but it was probably something like this:
  
Opening credits similar to that of House*, good theme music and rad MRI scan graphics. Cut to opening scene of me in an office with a team of doctors around me, as we laugh and maybe even cry about how shitty MS is, but how we're all so confident in this drug there is a light at the end of the tunnel. The doctor is very knowledgeable and can answer any questions I have ever had about MS, in fact hes the doctor who invented this drug so he knows everything about it. Everyone has white lab coats and stethoscopes. I have a team like Cameron and Chase to follow me around from test to test in a giant hospital. When I take the long silent pause to think about doing the study everyone is on egg shells, and then when I finally say "ok I'll do it" everyone erupts into joyous cheers and they all hug and dance and hand me a "welcome to your trial" gift basket. I leave smiling and confident in my new treatment and also like the fucking Samaritan of the year for signing up myself as a lab rat. Que theme music and closing credits.

It was more like this:
I pull up to the largest Neuro clinic I've ever seen. The waiting area is not very full but its HUGE. I didn't wait very long, but Jenny (the research coordinator) comes out and walks me into a generic lame-o exam room and tells me to fire some questions at her. Shes not positive what the drug does and will get back to me. She talks to me about the forms I've gotta sign, and stresses a ton about how if I get knocked up on this drug I'll birth some crazy half-ling baby, so I should be SUPER careful while bumpin'. I then ask to see the Neuro over seeing this jazz and I wait close to a full year for him to get in there. Hes nice, knows his shit. Though he totally almost talked me into another trial on the spot. Anyway, I ask him tons of questions about the drug, why they're doing this specific trial, what he thinks about the other DMDs, LDN and the Epstein Barr Virus just for shits and giggles. Then he said something that totally made some effing sense. He said, he thinks that MS could be caused by a virus, but not one that just stays in your body forever. He thinks that at some point we get a virus that looks very similar to other parts of our bodies, and once the immune system gets done fighting that one, it gets confused and then starts to attack the myelin. So its not that its continually fighting some crazy infection, or that its overreacting and just flaking out, but that its confused. Which make sense, and I may now be taking this on as my own theory.

So Dr. Thomas Giancarlo is his name in case you're wondering. So Dr. G leaves and Jenny and Chris come in, Chris is this cutsey old lady there to do the typical neuro testing and ask me a bunch of questions about poop and feelings. So I have to walk, and jump, and feel pin pricks you know the usual. I have some weirdo thing in my right eye with my pupils (don't remember what its called) but its so fantastical she brings in a PA to check me out because shes "only ever seen 1of these before".

So Chris is done and apparently I'm all good, Jenny is back, I sign my life away, and also consent to an AIDS test. Weird. I'll be crossin' my fingers on that one....kidding.

So I still have some X-rays and an Ultrasound to do before we even find out if I qualify...but I don't really think I'll get denied. So I'm pretty much doing the study. However when I agreed there was no welcome package, no music, no confetti falling from the ceiling. It was very anti-climactic. Though, for me, this clinical trial is like a baby step above what I'm doing to control my MS now, so I guess I shouldn't have expected fireworks and gift baskets with sausage and cheese just yet.

So I left and while waiting for the BF to pick me up, I called my sister filled her in, laughed at a joke about a condom and called it a day. Life unchanged.

*If you don't watch House I apologize because you wont get a lot of this. Also if you don't watch House, I'm sad that you're missin' out.